‘Tis the Season: Worst Gift Ever

Pram Watch is on hiatus until January, but this one’s too relevant to wait. Know a kid you’d like to knock off?  This is for you!

That’s a  “textbook holder” for your iPhone.  Or iPod.  Or whatever is more important than the kid you’re pushing.

The headline says it all:

. . . puts your phone where it belongs:  between you and your progeny.

Nothing says “holiday” like the gift of neglect.  Or death.  Remember this story from last July?  A loving grandmother was crushed by an SUV as she was pushing her grandson along a sidewalk.  She apparently managed to essentially throw the baby’s stroller out of the way of the vehicle, which saved the baby’s life, but  not hers.

The driver, who had himself just dropped-off  a child at a relative’s house, remained on the scene, called for help, passed drugs and alcohol tests, and was not charged.  Follow-up stories focused on the forgiveness the family showed to the driver — a forgiveness which may have been informed, in part, by their acknowledgement that the victim regularly pushed her grandchildren with earplugs on, listening to media, and was apparently doing so at the time of the accident.

Distraction kills, people.  While I believe that the world would be a more perfect place if there were no vehicles larger than a Mini Cooper, it’s unrealistic to believe that 1) a truck driver can see everything beneath him/her on a sidewalk and 2) a pedestrian can expect to be seen.

Could this accident have been prevented if Grandma had the full use of her ears?  If she had been trouble-shooting every potential obstacle along the way?  Maybe.  If you’re looking ahead, it’s actually pretty hard to miss a huge SUV backing out of a driveway.  If you’re boogieing to an inner beat, not so much.

As for the SUV, well, check this out, particularly the description of the sizes of the potential blind spots, about halfway down the article.  The same CNN article (from 2005) claims, in part, that

More than 2,400 children are backed-up over every year in the United States. Of those, about 100 are killed. In most cases, those children are run over by a parent or other relative.

That’s a lot of kids, folks.  If you’ve got manslaughter on your mind, outright homicide, or even just winging a kid, go for the media cradle.  It’s the perfect gift.  That neighbor with the Escalade will never be the same, but hey, that’s just collateral damage.

Thanks, Eph (via engadget)